To Be A Mom

Today was a busy, rowdy and laughing boys as usual day. Did some learning in the morning. Played at the park for lunch. Looked around at the sunshine and crazy warm weather for November, and thought of winter happening in other states.

Then tonight, as we got closer to bedtime, the boys complained of heads that hurt, and moved much more slower than usual, moaning. I ministered to them with oils and such, with Brooke following me around, watching.

Kevin said he wished he hadn't of ran so much today. I told him not to worry, and that's just what he does best, run:) I put a wet wash cloth on his head, rubbed some oils on his feet, and held his hand. I looked at his sweet, little face, and remembered how much I love him, and how glad I am to be their mom. To be the one to soothe them when the get sick, and need just plain ol comfort. Brooke intently touched him, and wanted to sleep in his bed with him. She is such a sweetheart. I turned on some music for Kevin, and he zonked out pronto.

I then put Brooke to bed, who wanted her own wet washcloth, even though she was bouncing around just fine. Turned her music on, then went for Ethan. Gave him a wet washcloth, and read to him some good "Calvin and Hobbes" stories, his favorite.

I then plugged in his Christmas lights, (they got a little excited to pull out the decorations early), got my guitar and made up a song for him. His eyes were closed, holding a stuffed Tigger, but his face would smile gently when he heard me sing his name. Best medicine ever. I thought back to that beginner guitar class I took at Ricks College back in 2000, and how grateful I am that I learned guitar. As he dozed off, I enjoyed playing John Denver songs to myself quietly. I love the sound og guitar picking.

I'm so thankful for moments to remind me to not yell so much or expect too much of these kids. To remember that they're cute kids trying to learn how to be good and all, but that they're gifts from above. All I need to do is love them, and take care of myself, fill my cup, be kind to myself, and stay afloat. Not every day are 'rays of sunshine' as my cousin's funny husband once said, but each day I can try a little more to love them more. It's not an easy job to be a mom, especially one with young kids so close in age. It can feel like survival mode for awhile,  but to give them hugs, and comfort their tender little hearts; I think that's just what Heavenly Father wants us to do for his children he sends to us.

Thankful

I love the word 'inspire'. I love what it does to my soul. I love that it ignites a spark for my ideas, and gives me such illumination to my goals. It is my favorite word.

I know that I have to be so careful with my time, as there are many things to be inspired by, and one can easily get caught up in the whirlwinds of goodness. I have to constantly monitor what I am spending my time on, and do inventories with myself. 

I have the desire to write good things, but I am not a gifted writer. I read from many others who have a beautiful way with words, a gift. I am a simple person. I love the beauty of things, but I feel that I am very simple, and that's ok.

I am blessed to know amazing friends. They teach me quietly all the time with their doings and examples. I try very hard not to compare myself, but I am grateful to know them, and to learn from them. 

I am thankful for my memories of my life so far. I've been on some wild adventures with my mom, college life, mission, and more. Life seemed to be busier and more active before the kiddos came. Now, I guess you could say it's still active with young kids, but slow, simple days at home, which are a blessing. 

Grateful for cooking. I love good food. The kitchen seems to always get destroyed with each meal. Can't seem to change that one. Maybe eat on more plastic plates on those crazy days. Nothing wrong with that:)

I am so thankful for my short time in Vancouver, WA. It's been three months since we moved back. I think of the people often, the sights of the trees, the climate, and the adventures we were on. They are in the back of my mind, while I focus on the present. It still is a gift to be home, and partake of the goodness that is here, but I still am forever grateful for our time up there. 

I am thankful for phone calls from old friends whom I've shared some fun chapters with. Hearing the sound of their voice takes me back to those days for a moment. Blessing. 

I'm thankful to be a Mom. It is the hardest calling I've ever had. I'm learning that it is one of constant personal renewal. In order to teach children how to be a good person, I need to be a good person. To cease yelling and bring peaceful interactions into the home, I must constantly work on myself, and pray for help always. Constant mistakes, and starting over again and again. Being a Mom changes you for the better, and shows you your worst moments, which help you want to change. Hard, but a blessing. 

These are the things I am grateful for today:)

My Manifesto

I am on a little vacation. It's a tender treat. My friend Amy flew me to her home in Stockton, CA to help her shoot a wedding. It's always fun to visit a new place. I took a walk this morning around the neighborhood, smelled the smells, listened to the birds and sounds, and marveled at the California trees that I grew up seeing.

This morning, I had some time to play around with Amy's endless supply of fonts on her computer. Oh, fonts are so much fun. I love quotes and all things inspirational, and so I looked through my Pinterest boards of quotes, typing them out with many pretty fonts. After a bit, I wanted to type out something that really spoke to me. I searched and searched for something, and finally thought "Well, I'll just write something". I came up with this. I think I'll print it, journal it, tape it on wall, and do a few more things with it. I like it. Had the thought to share it:)

I will no longer be hard on myself and give the adversary that power over me. I will also realize that I will make mistakes often, and will not expect perfection. The days are long, and the years are short with my children. I am blessed with three beautiful souls in my home who teach me how to be a better person. I will pray for the understanding and patience I need to experience better days with my children. I will be gentle. I will be kind. I will laugh more, and hug more. I will take time to deep breathe, and to slow down before I react. I will not let the natural man get the better of me, but will be vigilant in taking care of myself. To fill my cup more, to nurture my soul, that I may be a help to my family, and to others. I will love my husband and children with more passion, and more tenderness. I will treasure my husband more, and remember that we are together forever. I will remember that being a mother is a gift and a treasured calling. There still will be hard days. There still will be tears of frustration. Those are needed for growth and humbling. How else can I learn and be molded into something better, if not for the hard days. I will breathe and pray through them, and will embrace the good days, and savor the peaceful moments when they come. My time on earth is fleeting. Each day is a gift, and gives me more chances to learn something new, and to try again at becoming better and kinder. It wasn't supposed to be easy, but I have tools to help me through the rough parts, and tools to bring me peace and enlightenment. I have books to read written by inspired authors. I have scriptures that bring light to my mind, and are a channel to hear the spirit whisper to me, and music to flow through my home and heart. I have opportunities given to me every day, and I’m expected to not throw them aside, but to learn from them. I have angels on my side to strengthen me when I have a hard time finding hope. I can do this. I am alive, and I am here to embrace my time on earth, through the hard days and blessed days. Life is beautiful, through it all. 

Bednar's Social Media Address

A few weeks ago, David A. Bednar gave a powerhouse talk at BYU Education Week about using social media to share goodness. It was an amazing talk that can be seen here.  I loved it so much that I watched it a few more times afterwards and picked up new things.

We live in an incredible time today, with powerful tools of communication. He emphasized to use these tools to 'sweep the earth as with a flood' of good messages, upliftment, and peace. It left me thinking of what I like to do online; share things on Instagram and Facebook. I thought about the huge, vast amount of people who may see the things I share. Who knows what things I share may help one person, at least one person, find peace and draw closer to the Savior. I hope so.

The hashtag #sharegoodness has been recommended to be used when sharing things online through Instagram and Facebook. I imagine when posting something good, and using the hashtag, that it sends a ripple effect out into the online world. I love it. Missionary work now comes in all forms, and a large amount of it is online. Lifting, loving, and helping others can be done in small and simple ways.

I am a busy mom homeschooling my kiddos, running a photography business, and balancing life, but I want to use these tools more effectively like Bednar counseled us to. I love the gospel so much. I've seen lives with the gospel, and lives without. I love the peace it brings. I want to help in some small way share that goodness with others. I'm so thankful for this talk that rocked the world. I searched on Instagram under the hashtag 'Bednar'. There are loads of pics from people who were at that address, all ready to go and start sharing goodness, with a great attitude of 'let's do it'. How stinking exciting.

The church put up a great page on how to share goodness from this address. Check it out, and share something uplifting to help someone today:)

PS: I made a simple little printout of Bednar's guidelines HERE. Feel free to print off and hang it somewhere to see often:)